Monday, January 2, 2012

Day 213: Hungry

I'm really trying to lose this weight before Tyler comes home.  I'm at 135 now, which means I have seven more pounds to go.  It doesn't seem like a lot, but the last pounds are the hardest to lose.  Not to mention, I was 128 when I was doing Zumba daily, plus all the stairs and walking at school.  I don't have a gym I can go to and I'm doing Zumba as much as I can, though it's a different work out when taking the class, as opposed to teaching it.

I've stopped pushing myself to learn new routines because I never get to teach.  I need to find time every day to try to learn a routine or at least remember an old one!  I miss having my own Zumba classes.

I've continued to use the ankle weights during Zumba, despite the bruises, because it just really helps to get the butt a bit more.  I need all the help I can get because I can't how seven pounds will get me back to where I was.  I feel like I look 15 pounds heavier than I was, but my view of myself is skewed.  I see pics of me from two Thankgivings ago when I was a couple weeks preggo and I think I look so tiny, but at the time, I felt fat and gross.

I do know that my clothes are a good indicator.  I continue to refuse to shop or buy clothes that will fit me now because I don't want to get lazy just because I am not squeezing into everything.  I would wear my jeggings all the time if I didn't gross myself out by being in them!

I hope I can continue to lose it.  It would really be nice to be at or within two pounds of my pre-baby weight when Ty comes home on R&R.  Though, since I won't be able to do Zumba for those two weeks, we had better eat healthy and do a lot of walking!  I don't want to gain it back just to have to lose it again when he leaves.

Today I got my 20% off of the high chair, which has shipped, though I don't have it, yet.  Then we went to Target and picked up a couple things and did our grocery shopping.  Target has much better produce than HEB does, surprisingly.  I am always so disappointed with HEB.  Target produce is beautiful and fresh -- I really enjoy shopping there.  I saw some adorable shorts and dresses there, but I couldn't bring myself to even try anything on because I didn't want it to fit me now and I don't want to buy stuff for a body I don't have.

I also finished my second video of Eisley.  I used the introduction to Carmina Burana as the music and it's a funny video, however, YouTube has muted it because of copyright infringement on the music, apparently.  I don't know how people make videos with copyrighted music on it.  It certainly won't let me do it.

I am so terribly exhausted right now.  Eis wouldn't nurse earlier because I had some cauliflower and she doesn't care for it, so she had some formula.  I pumped and dumped, but got barely anything.  It takes forever to pump and I get like an ounce from each side -- geesh.  It feels like such a waste of time, but I know it's not because if I don't, she'll just scream in the middle of the night when she nurses and then I'll get angry.

I must go because I can barely see straight.

No picture of the day. Lo sieno!

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