So I decided to go knock on the door last night after I sat around stressed for long enough. I walked across the house and knocked on the door and waited. After about 20 seconds, I am told to come in. I open the door and it's pitch black -- I can't see anything. Michelle asks if I'm awake and I tell her that I have been for a little bit. I turn around and turn on the hall light, since I couldn't see anything. When I walk back into the room I see Michelle sleeping with Eisley in bed next to her.
I walk over and pick her up and thank Michelle for her help and head back to the nursery. I put down Eisley, who doesn't stir and go lay in my bed. I couldn't fall asleep! I was so stressed and even though I now had Eis, I felt as though my stress had been validated. Co-sleeping is incredibly dangerous, even with the best of intentions. A number of babies die from co-sleeping every year due to being rolled onto by an adult or suffocation in the bedding.
Eventually Eis woke up and I nursed her and she went back to sleep. I was able to sleep this stretch, but it wasn't long before she was up again and wanting to nurse. By this point it was 0515. Eis nursed and fell asleep, so I put her down, then put a note on the hall door telling Michelle that Eis is sleeping and doesn't need to be taken. Eisley ended up sleeping from 0620 - 0920. I, however, lay in bed worried that my note may make Michelle feel bad. Eventually I slept for an hour or so.
When Eis woke up, nursed, and got changed, we went into the living room and I passed her off to Michelle and decided to take a shower. When I came out, she had Eis in the My Little Lamb, which was great to see because then she wasn't getting spoiled sleeping only in arms, which makes my nights easier.
We chatted and watched tv throughout the day. I took Eis back every three hours and she'd nurse. I was hoping she'd nurse more frequently, but I can't wake her up or she'll never sleep right. I thought about pumping, but worried that as soon as I pumped, she'd wake up and want to nurse.
I learned a lot about Tim today and was surprised at what Michelle divulged. Some of it seemed too personal, but she didn't have any qualms about discussing things and I certainly didn't pry. I asked about insight as to why Ty may view certain things in a specific way and she had great insight. It'd be interesting to sit down with Ty and discuss what I learned and see what he thinks. However, that's a long way off because we never have time for real conversations. I'll save it for when he's home. :)
I had salad for lunch and she had her piece of pizza and for dinner we had leftover (frozen) BBQ beef and corn on the cob. It was delicious. We watched a few movies today and it was 2330 by the time we finished. Also, by that time, Eisley had woken up from her last three hour nap and I took her back to nurse. Unfortunately, I didn't realize what time it was and Michelle went to bed while I was nursing and I didn't get to say goodnight. I did get to put my sleepy girl down in the nursery where she belongs, so I was able to sleep when I went to bed... for a couple hours.
She was up for about an hour -- from 0330-0430 -- and it was the hardest hour I've had to be up. I've not felt so exhausted in the middle of the night in a long time before. I kept nodding off while nursing her in my chair! Luckily, I just got her down and it looks like she's staying down, so I'm off to sleep!
I got to chat with Ty tonight -- his morning -- and it was nice, though I only had one hand free, so my end of the convo was a bit short. I love talking to him and I miss him so much. I need his hugs.
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